Why Does It Hurt?

The more someone is so nice to you, and the more he matters to you, the more pain his death will cause. That’s the rule.

Death is a subject that will never be neither new nor old to us. It keeps on living. Death, is another way of living. People who pass away, will definitely live inside us. A kind of life that profoundly hurts. An existence that makes this pain easy to us, however, never too easy.

We begin at the very instance we are delivered to this world. We start growing. Developing. Becoming who we are. It’s a journey. We wake up everyday. We go back to sleep at night. The cycle keeps on going. Yes, life can be cruel and on some days it can be a bliss. But we are always moving to it. Approaching death.

Our collective experience of death is nothing but someone we know dies. You pick up your phone and you know he or she has passed away. Sometimes someone might tell you the news. Then, you feel death. You feel how close it is, but you didn’t realize. I sometimes even think, every time I witness death taking someone away, I begin to wonder… How close is it to me?

These thoughts some might think that they are a bit dark. I personally don’t. I keep embracing life for making me more present and feel all the feelings in this universe. Whenever I’m feeling something, it means that I’m alive.

Time

I guess no one can argue that our time here isn’t so important. Time is so valuable to us. When I was a child, my mother used to always say that it’s shocking how time is moving too fast. “It’s so shocking how time moved so fast and you’re going to middle school. It’s so shocking that you’re going to high school now!” Never understood why she would say that. And why everyone cared that time is running. Now, I think I get it. I see myself changing. I start to wonder, “how come have I changed this much? I have a beard. I have a heart that is full. I’m someone. I’m no longer something waiting to become someone.”

I’m beginning to adore each moment of my life. Enjoying the music of wind, the music of trees, and the music of Earth. All the sounds now matter. All the moments where strangers on streets laughing and enjoying their time. All the moments that I can curl up into bed. Listening to the noise of the AC. The ambiguous creaking in the room that might be from the furniture. As I said, each sound now matters. Each moment and feeling is way too precious to ignore.

Featured image by Morgan Housel


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